I’m not proud of this article nor happy while writing it. But I thought this is important to share.
In my more than six years of being a mother, I had some epic fail experiences which until now, are painful to recall but I know I have to. These are reminders that lead me to improve myself a little each day.
Last week I was in a hurry as I prepare everything at home. I was really preoccupied with the chores and my children who are getting ready for school. I was aware that my speaking voice had become demanding and stern, but since I noticed that they were following me in that manner, I didn’t mind at all. They were so quiet and I thought it was a bliss.
I asked my son to look for his musical toolbox that he’ll bring to school that day. And so, he started looking. I too started shouting when he said he can’t find it. I saw the look in his eyes and I knew that he knows what’s going to happen next if ever he failed to find it.
“Got it already mom…” he said
He braved the conversation with such words…
“Mom… are you happy about me now?”
I answered “yes” but it’s hard to switch back to a happy mood rightaway for this has always been my problem.
“Mom, I just wanted to say that it is not my music day today…”
Imagine the burden my child has to bear during my rantings.
I felt really embarrassed in an instant.
He was afraid of me but what mattered to him was to make me happy. It was an awful morning for both of us. I asked my child to forgive me and you know what he said?
“It’s okay mom, then let’s just think that this is another morning.”
I hugged him and he smiled.
I will always remember this moment of my childish behavior, when my child was so forgiving to me and had been a teacher once again.