The Rules of Parenting: Rule 2. No one is perfect

“Parenting” and “Perfection” are completely two unrelative words. I had my fair share of “mommy fails” and after reading this chapter, it is much clearer now, I will continue to raise my children in my own unique way. I sometimes do enjoy being an actual mother with flaws than a mother trying to be perfect for her children-which is certainly frustrating. What I now wanted my children to learn from me is that committing mistakes are normal; and that we have to move on and be a better version of ourselves the next day.


“A personal code for bringing up happy, confident children.”

The Rules of Parenting: Rule 1. Relax

I came across a book entitled, “Rules of Parenting” by Richard Templar. I thought for a second, “do I need this?” The truth is… I do.

I agree with the realities the author is telling me. This book puts everything in perspective, you in control, and your children on the path to becoming a successful, independent adults. Allow me to read to you The Rules of Parenting: Rule 1. Relax


“A personal code for bringing up happy, confident children.”

Dadvice: #1 On treating your Parents

 An exclusive for

Daddy Said…


Things that you want to make sure your kids know …or not know

Often times in life, we take a look back on things that we’ve done and thought – “if I only knew, I might have done better…”   This realization is not bad, when you think about it, it’s actually edification.  It means that you’ve now learned something new, which you didn’t know before.  Knowledge is Power.  And as a 90’s kid, I’ve come to realize that there is wisdom in what my favorite cartoon show always says – “Knowing is half the battle”.

Although it is true that experience is the best teacher, it doesn’t just have to be only your own experience that you should rely on to teach you.  We can also learn lessons from experiences of other people, and use it to our advantage.

In this section of Daddy said, I would like to give my kids that advantage and impart to them some of the important life lessons, and “life-hacks”, that I’ve learned in my life as well as from others.  Though some of these things may seem to be ‘common sense’ to us parents, at times, we tend to forget that our kids don’t know these things yet.  They could greatly learn from it and it may help improve their perspective in life.

Please join me as I share to my kids the stuff that they should know (or maybe shouldn’t know yet) about the birds and the bees, and the flowers and the trees…  And who knows, maybe you and your kids can share some of your life lessons too.

For today’s post…

dadvice 1

#1   On treating your Parents

Always love and respect them period.  Yes, it’s true that sometimes we might do some things that seem unfair to you, but do trust that we always have your best interest at heart.  I’ve loved you from the day you were born and will continue to do so until my dying breath, no intermissions in between.  It is the same with your mom, and your grandparents as well.  You may not always see it, but your mom and I love and respect our parents very much too.  They have been there for us, with love, patience, and understanding, holding our hands, ever since we could remember.  And this is the same promise that we make to you.  When all the world comes crumbling down, we are the ones who will always be here for you… near, far, and wherever you are.

And the next time you get to talk with your parents or elders, take time to listen.  There are a lot of things they can teach us, simply by telling us the consequences of what they did, or did not do, in their lives. Reciprocate with love, compassion and most of all, with respect.


What is your greatest priority as a mom?




As I asked a friend what being a mother means to her,

she answered me right away,

“Being a mom to
me means that now I will always be a mom first and a wife second.”

It took me a while to realize what she said. It was a cliché, so I didn’t think much about it. Then it hit me… “What is my greatest priority over everything around me?” What she said was indeed true.

Children. They are our greatest priority. For a mom like me, I think I won’t be able to sleep soundly at night if I missed out doing something for my children. No matter how busy I am, I will stop to attend to their needs. And even in the middle of my slumber, I will wake up right away, and go to their bed once they call out my name.

I am doing this out of love.

Mom first.

And wife second.

I’m sure their dad will understand.

The joys of “not just a regular kind” of mommy

 Here’s another amazing article from a “not just a regular kind” of mommy we used to know.

Read on, and you’ll see what I mean.

...and she smooshed my Filipino nose

“…and she smooshed my Filipino nose”

What is being a mother to you?

When I married my husband, I knew I would become an instant Mommy. My husband has a daughter from his previous marriage. Despite what happened in the past, I knew that I would play an important role in their life and in my step-daughter’s future. My step-daughter’s name is Ashlyn. She calls me MAMAGOO. My mother came up with that name because it is not a Filipino custom to call people older than you by their first name. My nickname is Magoo and of course, you know what Mama stands for. After we got married, Ashlyn immediately called me by this name.

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When you are tempted to yell…

Mommy Didit with Daddy Ryan and baby Harmony

Raising a child has its ups and downs. Maybe it’s quite a bit easier when both parents are there for their children physically, but for a military wife and a mommy to a 3-year-old smarty pants, it’s not just a walk in the park.


Let me share with you an eye-opening article I have read from a dear friend’s blog “My Daily Dose of Harmony.”


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On being a better Daddy

with dad

“One night a father overheard his son pray:

Dear God, Make me the kind of man my Daddy is.  Later that night, the father prayed: Dear God, Make me the kind of man my son wants me to be”   


Here are some things that I’d like to share that I’ve learned from friends, uncles,  relatives, my own experience, and of course from my own Dad.

Be Patient and firm.  Yes, there are some times when they’ll get on your last nerve (…ok, lots of times), and I agree that there are times that you have to go “Disciplinarian”. But always try and practice to be a little bit more understanding and patient than you were before; Kids are kids after all (remember when you were at that age too?).  It may take time for them to learn to behave the way you want them to, but with your awesome guidance, they’ll get there eventually.

Be a proud Dad. Praise their accomplishments and show that you’re proud of the good things they’ve achieved. This is positive reinforcement. Believe in their dreams, and no one can take it away from them.

Always keep your word.  Kids learn by example, so set a good one by being true to your promises always.  If they have requests that you’re not sure you could accommodate, explain to them why you might not be able to do it.  More importantly, it builds their trust in you.

Be the man. Kids usually look to their fathers as the authoritative figure in the household (well, with mommy’s permission of course). It is important that you show authority to your kids, but also remember not to abuse the power.  And when things get rough and tough, “I got this.” would be what the kids expect to hear from dad.  Make your kids feel secure whenever you’re around (you’re the hero who fights monsters under the bed after all).

Don’t be afraid to apologize and show affection.  Yes, this is contrary to the authoritative figure that we need to portray, but well, fatherhood is complicated stuff.  When your kids see that you are brave enough to admit your mistakes, and comfortable in showing your feelings, they become more well-rounded individuals as well.  Learn to compromise on certain things, and make sure your expectations are fair to him/her as well.

Be a good provider.  You don’t have to be filthy rich, but make sure that your family has enough.  Save money for their future, but don’t forget to give them a treat every now and then as well.

Guide them into making good decisions, and help them to learn to decide for themselves. Kids like to feel independent, and when you teach them how to make good decisions, they’ll be able to carry this as they grow older.

Just be around. Even when you really have nothing planned, make time to hang-out (You used to do the same thing with your friends, right?).  Learn about their interests and generally just get to know more about what’s happening with their day. And be fun… dance, laugh, play with your kids as much as you can. Build happy memories together.

Respect your own parents. As we’ve mentioned, children learn by example. And what better way to teach them love and respect than by showing them yourselves how your parents are treated and loved.

Love your wife and keep her happy.  Same as with the previous statement, when your kids see how you respect and love their mother, they will give the same regard to their Mom as well.  Sons will know how to rightfully treat their future wives, and daughters would know how properly they should be treated.

I also remember a line by John Travolta in the 80’s movie “Look Who’s Talking”…

“A good father keeps the mother happy, so she doesn’t drive the kids crazy.”


Photo credit : Mrs. Aurea Nicolas

The most awesome person in the whole wide world…

a birthday poem for”>

Daddy said…

Kids, in general, demand so many things from their parents…from toys, to playtime, and their parent’s affection.  They seek attention in every little thing that they say and do.

But the explanation for this is simple.  It’s because they want to share something that is important to them, with someone who is important to them.

To your sons and daughters, you are the greatest, coolest, and most awesome person in the whole wide world.

–Parents are easily idolized by their children, and follow their example.


Mommy said…

I’d like to share with you one of my most unforgettable conversation with my daughter.

<Looking at her, and seeing how much she’s grown>

Mommy:  You are sooo big!…

Sofie: …you are bigger!

Mommy: And you are so smart!

Sofie: …and you too!

Mommy: You’re such an angel!

Sofie: …and you are Mama Mary!

This conversation happened just a few minutes after I scolded her for not going to sleep on time.  I remember that I was running out of energy to scold her, so I just lay down beside her to talk.

She was very forgiving and totally forgot the scolding, in an instant.  It was then that I realized that she didn’t go to sleep yet, because she really wanted some “alone time with mommy”.

We had a nice chat, and we slept happy.

Sometimes it’s hard to understand what our kids really want to do, especially when what we want to be done is something different, and then we try to impose ourselves.  We know for a fact that our kids can learn so much from us and we want to impart our knowledge and experiences to them, so we usually want them to sit down and listen.  But just as much as they can learn from us, we can also learn from them.  Look at our lives and ourselves from their perspective, and see how awesome they see us, and in turn, realize that we can also still better ourselves.