Sofie was playing with the tablet and Zack wanted to have his turn

Z: Ate (big sister), can I play now?

S: No.

Z: If you won’t let me play, I will delete that file.

His sister handed the tablet to him without saying a word.

The art of psywar.

Effortless.

I know he has a strong personality and he always use his reputation as the youngest to be able to get what he wants. Yet I told him that “if big sister won’t let you play in the tablet, do something else, not delete the file!”

Another conversation happened this morning.

Z: Ate (big sister) will you let me use your pen?

S: No

Z: If you won’t let me, I will throw everything

….

Okay so I told him to do something else, and clearly, he’s going to do something else.

M: Zack!

Z: (he reasons to me using his soft voice with matching waving of his hands around his books)     No mommy… I just said I will throw my things… 

I remembered the time when he was two years old, he was not afraid to play along with the big boys. He is the smallest in the crowd yet the most enjoyed. The moment I sensed danger when his big friends are getting out of control, I immediately asked him to leave the playground. With his little voice, he let go of these broken words “No! They- are- my-friends.” I am amazed with this kind of bravery and this kind of reasoning at his very young age.

Now that he’s four years old, I guess his audacity grew up with him, too.

My mom-in-law once told me, “You should play it by the ear when you discipline your child.”

To discipline my youngest child has always been a challenge. He often uses his crocodile tears to get away from the trouble he just did. And most of the time, even if I am not in a scolding mood, he always reasons.

So how do you really discipline your youngest child?

I will use Stephen R. Covey’s piece of advice: “Seek first to understand, then to be understood.”

Here’s something I found from the Oz blog that explains a lot about my son’s behavior.

“Youngest Child 

The youngest are the individuals in the family. They’re more playful, and since they have to fight for attention, they’ve developed a sense of humor as a way of doing that. A lot of actors and famous comedians are the youngest in the family. They tend to take more risks because they’ve been more protected, so they feel indestructible. They have a lot of confidence, and that comes from the “watch what I can do” attitude. They’re creative and can be great problem-solvers. They also have a need to “dethrone” the first-born. Also, they can go out of their way to prove their individuality, since they end up with all the hand-me-downs. They are the charmers. As thrill/pleasure seekers, they can be most at risk for addictive behavior, which can range from compulsive eating and drinking to sex. (editors note: now I am alarmed)

– Article written by Sue Varma, MD
Board certified Psychiatrist and Clinical Assistant Professor of Psychiatry, NYU Langone Medical Center”  Source: http://www.doctoroz.com/videos/what-birth-order-can-predict-about-you

Here are some good pointers from parents.com:

“Parenting your Last-Born Child

• Lastborns often feel they aren’t taken seriously. Let her make some family decisions — like where to go out for dinner or which video to watch together.
• Acknowledge his “firsts.” When he learns to tie his shoes or pees in the potty, call the relatives like you did with the firstborn. And be sure to make a big deal of his artistic accomplishments, displaying his drawings on the fridge, as you did for his older siblings.
• Give the youngest child some responsibilities, even something simple like putting napkins on the table. Lastborns can end up with few family duties because they’ve learned to duck out of work or other family members have dubbed them too “little” to be able to handle things.” Source: http://www.parents.com/baby/development/sibling-issues/how-birth-order-shapes-personality/?page=4

Zack’s always happy and non-stop. He is his big sister’s “baby” and his big brother’s “sidekick.” He is our mascot and our daily dose of laughter.

He has always been the life of the party. Someday we’ll just laugh about the little jokes he made when he was younger.

The best is yet to come.  And hopefully, when we grow old, his dad and I are still quick enough to ride along with his grown-up humor; or maybe strong enough to handle a mini-heart attack while laughing at his silliest.

We love you Zack.